"I had never experienced PMS, or hormone related mood swings or anxiety.

I took the pill for 2 years, and while I did not realise it at the time, during this time I suffered severe depression and instability in my life. I was constantly negative, with no self esteem, I frequently blew up at my partner about insignificant ridiculous things. I even became self harming, with suicidal thoughts at some points. I ended our relationship as I irrationally blamed him for my anger, low self esteem and moodiness... I then stopped taking the pill and after a couple of months slowly returned to my old, happy, stable self. I was no longer overwhelmed by that oppressive sense of negativity that followed me around the entirety of my time on the pill. But I unfortunately didn't make the connection between those feelings and the pill... Until now.

Two months ago I started taking the pill again. I now know this is the problem. I once again feel negative, introverted, argumentative, lethargic and generally numb and unhappy. Again, it is an effort for me to be happy and put on a 'normal' front around friends and family. This is NOT like me. My life is and always has been wonderful. I am in my 20's, had never had depression before this. There is no logical reason for me to feel this way and I blame the pill. Reading this forum has made me feel so much better, knowing that I am not the only one who has experienced these horrible side effects. It is sad that so many women appear to go through this unaware of the fact that the pill could be contributing."
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"I have never wanted to go on the pill, as i thought it was artifically going to mess with my body´s natural hormones and cycles. I have never even liked the idea of any chemically engineered drugs and pharmacutical produces and beleive in a more natural and holistic aproach to treating yourself and your body.

However at the age of 23 i found myself at the beginning of what i felt would be a serious and long lasting relationship ( the first one in my life). And although i was adversed to going on the pill, myself and my partner did not like using condoms and i did not want to get pregnant.
I started taking the pill and moved abroad with my partner. Within the first 2weeks i started to notice i was more emtional than usualy and definately more teary. I did understand why i was feeling this way .So i continued taking it. My first cycle of 21days worth of pills came and went with my frist ón time´ period ( i have never been very regualar). I was happy to be able to know when i was going to have my period and it felt great to freely have sex without thinking about condoms and knowing i wont get pregnent.but after 2 more weeks of mood swings, sore boobs, crying and our relationship being effected, im giving it up, my sanity is worth more to me than contraception! we will just have to get use to using condoms!!!

However into the second month on the pill i find myself crying for no reason, or over little stupid things, being very moody and emtional going from crying to smiling to feeling depressed. I am usually a very optomistic and ´´ loving life´ kind of person and i began to wonder what was happening to me?

I put it down to my new job i have found with my partner in the new country, which was having its ups and downs.
It has been causing maybe irrational arguments, disussions and un warnented conflict in our relations"

"I started taking Yasmin 5 days ago and feel constantly sick in my stomach, moody and generally unwell. So I decided to look on the internet to see if anyone else had the same symptoms and was amazed at how many people had a bad reaction too. I took myself off Yasmin now and already feel better after just one day. It makes me wonder how many young girls are put on this pill and just put up with the side effects because their told its normal by their doctor. I know its not normal because I have not been on any pill for ten years prior to this and felt so much healthier without it. I think who ever invented this one got it very wrong."

"I am absolutely blown away by all these comments. At age 22 I had been on Levlen for about 3 years before I took myself off it. I realised it was making me depressed. I only noticed because when I had my period I was in a happier mood. It just clicked one day and I felt so much better afterwards. Im now 26 and have been on Estelle for exactly a year. Strangely enough I have just realised ive been battling with a horrible case of depression for exactly the same length of time.

I have tried 2 different therapists for councelling but it didnt help so I saw a GP in January this year about other options and was prescribed Loxamine (Paroxetine) anti depressants after Amitryp didnt work for me. At first I felt worse and ended up in hospital twice with panic attacks. After this I was I was prescribed an anti anxiety pill called Ativan to help with the initial effects of the Loxamine. I have just thrown my entire bottle of Ativan down the toilet after finding out that it should not be given to people with severe depression and thoughts of suicide.I was really angry when I found that out because my doctor was given my notes from the hospital one of the nights I went in after a panic attack and which said that id thought about hurting myself.

Ive been on and off with my boyfriend because I keep getting angry and upset at him for nothing which is doing my head in because hes my best friend and a great partner. Like a lot of people on this page im also super paranoid and suspicious of his every move! I am suprised and so thankful hes still with me after all the crap ive put him through in the last year.

After finding out about the Ativan causing depression I did more research on the other medications i'm on and found this page. I am going to stop taking my contraceptive pill because the more of this page I read the more I beleive thats what my problem is. Ill post again on this page in a few weeks time for an update!"

"This forum makes me feel so normal. I am just attempting to take the pill again after 1.5 years off it. This is my third attempt and already I feel depressed, have started crying all the time and think that my boyfriend doesnt understand me. I wish doctors would warm you about these side affects because they can ruin your relationship. After I finish this months supply Im going off it again because its not worth the trouble. Condoms might suck but its better to be happy."

"I have been on the pill about 2 years now. First I was on Cilest which was awful for me. It made me so emotional and depressed. I swapped to Ovysmen which I have been on since. Although it was great at first, I am currently so depressed and emotional. I have been diagnosed with UC (ulcerative colitis) recently, which in itself is an emotional rollercoaster. During the worst part of my illness, I stopped taking the pill, due to lack of intercourse where I was in so much pain. I started back on the pill after a few months and now I feel more depressed than ever. I'm not sure if it's where I have been ill, or the medication I'm on, the Pill, or a mixture of it all. All I know is that I cry so much about nothing, and I am so upset about everything, and have been for at least a year or so. It's destroying my relationship with my boyfriend who I have been with for a bit over 3 years. He is suffering because of my mood swings and constant crying and complaining. He doesn't deserve it and it makes me hate myself for doing it to him. I just don't know what to do. I feel like a wreck. Does anyone have any suggestions? Thanks :-)"

"How refreshing to find a forum such as this. I have been no Yasmin for 6 months now, after giving myself a break from the pill for 1 year. I have been an emotional mess for the majority of those 6 months - crying for no reason, feeling down, accusing my boyfriend of not loving me enough or understanding me, no energy to do the things i would normally do, ie: gym, horrible headaches to the point where i feel physically sick. I thought that these feelings would balance themselves out within a couple of months but I find they are getting worse. Come to think of it, the last time I was on the pill, I was on yasmin for 1 year and got diagnosed with depression, was on anti-depressants and the doctors never mentioned that the pill could be exacerbating the issue. How wrong is that? I am sure that the majority of depression cases with women come down to the pill -doctors dont even test you first to see what type of pill you should be on! As from today I have stopped taking Yasmin and will be seeing my doctor to find alternative methods of contraception as well as talking to a naturopath to balance my hormones. I also have a history of thyroid problems with the women in my family, and will be getting this checked out too.

Also, if you are in a relationship, talk to your partner about what is goin on - I didnt for the first few months because I thought it was just me, but it has gotten to the point where I needed his support and understanding in this difficult stage of my life - all because of one little pill!"

"I have recently started on the Yasmin pill after 9 years of not being on the pill at all (im 1.5 weeks into first month) and have found the last week to be unbareable emotionally, my moods are all over the place from hour to hour almost. I have been crying uncontrollably for very little reason and actually have felt a little suicidal at one point. Seriously is this considered normal or even safe? My doctor or pharmacist did not mention that this would be a side affect of taking this pill, in fact the pharmacist raved about how great it was and the wonders it would do for my hair and skin, not to mention i wouldnt put on any weight!!! Im eating like a horse and is the past week have sprouted 6 large pimples on my chin, i havent had a pimple since i was about 14 im now 31!! any advice from anyone as to whether they think i should stick this pill out and hope the side affects diminish with time? the reports on people experiencing low libido really scare me too, my partner and i have a fantastic sex life and its not something i am prepared to mess with for the sake of lighter periods and less severe cramps. if anyone has had similar experiences please let me know. cj"

"Hello,
after reading all of your comments, I really feel reassured i'm not the only one who has lived this, because as all of you said, doctors just don't warn you about the possible side effects you could feel such as depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts. I now stopped the pill and i'm already starting to feel like myself again. Like many of you, i have tendency to have depressive thoughts and anxiety, and what's for sure is that after starting the pill (Alesse), i started not feeling like myself at all, being unhappy and always depressed day after day, except if I was putting effort to occupy myself and not have bad thoughts, which is not natural. I have had a few anxiety attacks due to the pill, which have scared me a lot and I cried a lot. I took the pill for about 7 months, and all of this time I never thought it was the reason I felt so bad.
The doctor told me it was extremely rare that the pill had these effects on women, and that i'm his first patient to report these side effects. He told me to try stopping the pill to see how i feel, and then he told me it was probably just the winter blues, that i should try going to the tanning salon more often and i would be okay.
Anyhow, now that i've stopped the pill, i have a new problem: sex.
I have a boyfriend (with whom i started taking the pill) and we have always been very active sexually. I'm really not a big fan of the condom, because i think it just doesn't feel as nice and as exciting, and i really wouldn't like it to become a ''turn off'' for my boyfriend and I when it comes to sex.
So, I would like to know if there is any other contraceptive pill that any of you have tried that didn't have the side effects i mentionned? I know a lot of you said you tried a lot of different brands that all did the same, but maybe someone has a miracle solution for me?
Also, i heard a lot of bad things about the IUD, what do you guys think?"

"I have to say, I am SO refreshed to read these posts! I can't believe it! I was on Yasmin for 6 months and it nearly ruined my life! I was so emotional, I used to come home and cry for hours on end for no particular reason. I had so many constant negative, destructive and paranoid thoughts (eg "I'm not a good person" "I don't deserve my boyfriend's love") and it was the most emotionally and mentally painful time in my life.

I'm looking into natural fertility management and would highly recommend people read "The Pill: Are you sure it's for you?" by Jane Bennett and Alexandra Pope, published by Allen and Unwin Australia, 2008. I cried when I read this book, it put everything I had been through into perspective and made me realise there are alternatives, and feeling that way was NOT normal. I, like some of the posts above mention, am a pretty chillaxed individual! I was always an easy going person with no tendency to depression or anxiety, but that period of time I was on the pill completely changed my personality. I also put on a large amount of weight from the pill, that I am still struggling to use.

I just think more women need to read the book I mentioned above (I'm not plugging it for any reason other than...it helped me!) and think through your options. Make sure you're aware of your own emotions - if you're not aware of dates, your cycle and your normal character, it makes it all the harder to recognise even subtle changes. If you don't feel right, chances are something isn't right - and it's not just that you're stressed at work or you had a bad day, it really could be something tied up with the Pill you're on.

And also, I can say, having been off the Pill for about 6 months, I am almost completely back to my normal self!! Hurray! It did take a while, I cried and cried for hours the first few weeks (over like..nothing I might add) and felt a bit weird, but it does all settle down.

You don't have to feel this way! You can be free!!! hehe :) xo"

"I have been diagnosed with endometrioses and have had an op to remove a cyst from my right overy. Since then my gyno hav tried me on a number of pills to stop my periods by not taking the sugar pills.Sounds simple but i am so emotional and angry. My family suffer the most and I feel like crap. Well I dont know what to do next as if I dont stop the bleeding the pain and bloating are mstill there. The pain is qiute bad. Well just thought I would put it out there. I am the mum of 3 boys and I am half way through a teaching degree. I am 36yrs old. Thanx Karen"

"I have been on the contraceptive pill for 21 years except when I stopped to have my 3 children but then I fell pregnant within the first few months of coming off the pill (before each pregnancy though I did miscarry early on but then I would fall pregnant again the very next month). I have been trying to get off it now for 1 year. Every time I try to come off it I get extremely anxious, a pain in the back of my head on right side of head, a lightheaded dizzy feeling on right side, aches and pains in my right shoulder and a pain in my lower back right side plus symptoms of a sinus infection on right side. I go to the Dr and he just told me to go back on the pill which I did do. But last September I decided enough was enough and stopped again. The first 4 months I was fine with my periods coming regularly every 31 days but I was experiencing symptoms of cycstitis. Then the 5 months I started with the above head symptoms again but the cycstitis is gone periods are still regular though. Can anyone recommend anything for this I don't want to go back on the pill and I am already taking Fish Oil tabs (omega 3 and 6) 30 plus tabs with contain black cohosh for hormone balance and a migraine vitamin. I really don't want to go back on the pill but I would just like to feel better and enjoy my life with my husband and 3 kids. I'm always thinking the worst of everything and think that I may have something more wrong with me then just a hormone imbalance. can someone please help me."

"I am a 27 year old mother of one who has taken oral contraceptives from the time I was 14 years old (besides the obvious pregnancy period). As of two months ago I have ceased oral contraceptives altogether in place of condoms. In case any other women out there are thinking of doing the same you should know that it takes a good time for this medication to get out of your system, and be prepared for an emotional rollercoaster - especially the first month, but your hormones do start to work themselves out. I have found it to be truly a positive step in my life and I cant really explain it but all the self esteem issues i had when i was on the pill (Marvelon, Yasmin) seemed to disappear, for instance, like a lot of women who have been on the pill for a long period of time, I had a mild case of adult acne and minor weight issues. When i came of the pill, i found these things i was so obsessed with on a daily basis, trivial in the scheme of things. Not only that but the "negative" attitude I was plagued with has continued to lift as time progresses off the medication.
It makes me angry that we are conned into thinking what is a natural process for our bodies should be controlled by fake hormones, I mean isnt having a REAL period what makes us a woman in the first place?
Shouldnt we be embracing this natural part of us and not trying to supress it?
Again anyone thinking of taking this big step -
1. Ride out the horrendous first month - I recommend keeping a diary.
2. Be SUPER strict with condoms - cos sometimes that can be difficult."

"I am 26 and have not taken the pill for the last 3 years and am happy healthy and doing well managing my fertility myself with the support of my husband. In the past I have had symptoms of depression associated with the use of the pill and Implanon. Implanon was not a good experience and after a very rocky year with it I had it removed as I knew it was causing me to be very unstable. I believe in taking charge of your own health and relying on your own ability to manage and understand your cycle. This is pro-active health care which is available to all women and no one knows your body like you do. It is not hard and the benefits are great and many. Don't let major pharmacutical companies tell you that you cant manage you fertility yourself, they have a product to sell and they are very good at marketing. If you are going to take a natural approach I would recommend doing a lot of research so that you fully understand how your body works and always have a packet of condoms on the bed side table. Listen to your body and have the faith in yourself to believe what it is telling you. I firmly believe that oral contraceptives are a mixed bag with far more negatives than positives. Good luck"

"OK..

I am a well educated 31 year old, experienced and knowledgeable woman, both on a professional
and personnel level. For many years I was a professional athlete and currently practice as a specialist
in the health field working in hospital and reamote settings.

I have a great understanding and have intensley study the body, specifically my body.

After 10 years of not taking the pill,
I decided this year (due to heavy demands of university study and irregular heavy cycles) I
would re-commence the pill, in attempt to balance out my energy and lifestyle. Initaly I opted for the very
low dose Microgynon 20 which was fabulous ..except after a short time heavy breakthrough
bleeding occurred..
then the doctor started me on Yasmin.. which has been horrific. At a higher dose I still have not stopped
bleeding and for the first time in many years I am now crying, extremely over emotional and have felt
like I don't have insight, which I have no reason to feel at all. This is incredibly out of character , as I live a
very satisfying and wonderful life.. I can't ignore the possibility, in fact .. the highly likely possibility that these
irregular emotions, have occurred because of the pill. Im a very chilled and easy going person normally
that works hard but enjoys life without major drama.

Researching the drugs that comprises the make up of the pill has certainly opened my mind to
perhaps a more logical reasoning of what has been happening.

PLEASE SEE A TRUE SPECIALIST IN WOMENS HEALTH WHEN CONSIDERING TAKING THE
CONTRACEPTIVE PILL. IT WILL MAKE ALL THE DIFFERENCE AND POSSIBLY BE A MUCH LESS
COMPLICATED PATH LONG TERM. RESEARCH THE DRUGS THAT ARE IN A PILL AND TAKE THE
TIME TO MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION WITH THE RIGHT MEDICAL PRACTIONER."

"Dear PurpleRose, your side effects sound exactly like mine!! I missed the news story about how the pill was linked to a lady's suicide last night and I can't seem to find the transcript for it anywhere. If you know where I could find the story, could u please post the web address to it? or provide a brief summary of what the story said? Thanks"

"I am so relieved I found this website, it didn't really hit me until tonight that Yasmin has been causing my unhappiness. Actually I thought I was just depressed because my boyfriend was away for a month and a half and I just thought I missed him. But when he came back I realized I really had no interest in sex (even though I had missed him utterly for the month and a half he was gone) and when we did have sex it was painful because I was pretty dry. Which was NEVER a problem before I went on birth control. Then tonight the depression hit me like a bus. I was out with my boyfriend and friends and having an amazing time and suddenly I wanted to cry. Then before long I had convinced myself that my boyfriend was no longer interested in me (which he obviously is because he just recently asked me to move in with him) and that he only wanted me for sex! Which is a ridiculous thought for anyone who has ever met him. I even had myself convinced he was flirting with my friend. This pill is evil, I am hungry all the time, even after a big meal and I never really had an appetite before. I haven't actually tested it but I'm pretty sure I've gained a few pounds because of the hunger issue. I've decided to stay on it for another month or so because I'm just finishing my first month of Yasmin. After already being on Alesse for two months. I've also noticed a difference in vision and a general fuzziness in every day activities. Like
I have no attention span anymore (which I never had a problem with either) I'm also exhausted even after a full nights sleep. Honestly I wouldn't recommend this pill to my worst enemy. It's exhausting and equally not worth it.

Also, ladies if anyone is having the same problem as I am, please tell your guy what's happening. They get very confused and convince themselves that they are doing something wrong. Which can also be damaging to the relationship! Communication is key when these kinds of problems arise!"

"I first began taking the pill (Microgynon) when i was 17. At the time i was studying for my HSC and was having quite a stressful time. I had a tendency towards mild depression but i never considered it to be too serious. After starting the pill however i became severely depressed with suicidal thoughts and just felt like i wasnt coping at all. i felt like i just wasnt myself and it was really affecting my relationships and quality of life. i read that the pill could do this to you and so i stopped taking the it and definatly felt more normal again shortly after.
At age 20 i had been using the withdrawal method with my partner and became pregnant. i had an abortion and decided to use condoms. Just recently at age 22 i thought i might try the pill again and just see how i went. i started on Yasmin 4 weeks ago and i am shocked to see that once again i had these overwhelming feelings of depression and anxiety. My mood has been very low and i feel like i have just been blowing everything out of proportion. I just dont think the pill agrees with me. i know it is fine for alot of my friends but i dont think i will ever touch it again. I remember a naturopath telling me that the pill is very unatural because its artificial hormones controlling your whole hormonal system. I know people have to do what they can to avoid pregnancy but i just think that its not for everyone."

"I have an ovarian cyst and possibly endometriosis. I v been suffering severe & disabling period pain for 6 years. being just 22 I realli worry that I might not b able to have children later if the cyst enlarges..all docs said i should take the pills, but i tried for a few days and microleven made me feel bloated, depressed, have a headache and generally unwell. they say all these probs will go away after a few months and the benefites of the pills for endo should not b overlooked. i dunno wat 2 do now *_*"